Space Karen
Twitter, FIFA, and the way the world works
I left Twitter in 2019 and it was the best thing I ever could have done for my brain. I almost immediately felt more at peace, felt my attention span grow longer, and I got so much more done. For almost three years I was happy. And then we found out that several members of the LA City Council are wildly racist asshats and one of them thinks he can just sit there and keep his job forever so I logged back in to troll him into oblivion. This happened to be right before both midterms and Elon Musk aka Space Karen aka The Worst Billionaire was forced to buy Twitter and then immediately decided to Brewster’s Millions his $44 billion. So, I decided to stick around.
It was fun for a while. Twitter is at its best when the world is falling apart so it stands to reason that it is truly at it’s best when its own world is falling apart. Together we all joked and lamented while watching a master class in how to fail at warp speed even while feeling just absolutely awful for the employees of a service that really did change the world, for better and for worse. But then SK did two things on one day that killed it for me. First, he posted a photo of himself and a bunch of employees working at 1am as if that is ever a good thing.
A few problems with this photo:
It was 99% male, which even in the tech world is a surprise these days and especially at Twitter which had a lot of female employees.
Twitter has lost something like 75% of its workforce in the last two weeks or so and one painful truth is that many of the people who have stayed have done so because they are on H-1B visas which are essentially indentured servitude. An H-1B visa is tied not just to being employed but to your specific employer which means that if you leave your job you’re going home and even without the current pre-recession layoffs happening across the tech industry right now you never really know if you’ll get another job that will get you back to the states. So the men in those photos are, essentially, hostages.
Elon Musk is a turd.
Then, as if this gross display of fiefdom wasn’t enough, he unrestricted Donald Trump’s Twitter account. And folks, I gotta tell ya, I just am not in the mood to share social media space with that tangerine traitor. So I bounced. My brain, I’m sure, is thrilled. It was fun connecting with old friends again and who knows, I may be back, I’ll have a book to shill soon, but for now, that was just too much grossness in one day.
OH ALSO FIFA SUCKS
FIFA and the IOC are well known as the two most corrupt institutions on Earth (although apparently SCOTUS is trying to catch up). It’s sad because the World Cups (men’s and women’s!) and the Olympics are without doubt the greatest events on the planet and it would be really nice to be able to enjoy them without knowing that you are supporting some of the worst people who ever lived. Although if you happen to be in Lausanne, Switzerland pay the money to go to the Olympics Museum it’s amazing and the Olympics are the best. Also read up on Baron Pierre de Coubertin, that guy was a total badass.
Is it a coincidence that both FIFA and the IOC are headquartered in Switzerland? Methinks not.
Anyways so FIFA sold the World Cup to Qatar which, along with being wildly homophobic and corrupt at every level also murdered over 6500 people to build the stadiums and infrastructure for the Cup and oh yeah banned beer at the stadium at the last minute in a move that was very much not about the beer.
If you are not aware of how and why FIFA is the absolute worst I will direct you to this Netflix docuseries that, in a perfect chef’s kiss, was released this month.
So how do these things go together?
As children we’re told this fairy tale that if you work hard and do good things you’ll be rewarded. That is objectively, absolutely, and totally false. We live in a world that rewards the worst people the most, especially if they have penises. I mean let’s face it, the only reason Elizabeth Holmes got eleven years that she won’t serve (but still, YAAY!) is because she screwed over some rich white men. She wasn’t even convicted for the whole PERFORMING SADISTIC TESTS ON CANCER PATIENTS thing. Even the villains on reality shows always become the most famous and beloved characters. Human nature is not what we keep pretending it is and, I don’t know if that means we should all start robbing banks and losing fiddle battles to Satan himself but I do think we need to fundamentally shift our understanding of how the world works so that we can actually figure out how to change it. You can’t fix a system if you haven’t read the manual.
Watch:
The Menu (theatres)- I once ate at Alinea and it was both absurd and wonderful and also I would not have been surprised or really all that insulted if the kitchen staff had tried to kill us. This movie is great. Watch it immediately.
The Great British Baking Show (Netflix)- Season 10 finally wrapped up on Friday which meant I could finally binge the whole series and while I wanted one of my two favs to win they both choked in the end and the winner deserved it and also is adorable. Watch, but close your eyes when they get to the s’mores. Nobody should ever have to see that.
Official Competition (AMC+, rent)- If you can get past how ridiculously beautiful Penelope Cruz is enough to watch the movie then you will love this. And if you can’t, then you’ll get to watch Penelope Cruz be beautiful for a whole movie and how lucky are you?
Listen:
Ruined (podcast)- If you are a person who can’t watch scary movies but wants to know what happens in them then this is the podcast for you. They’ll walk you through it and it’s not scary at all but it is fun.
Where Should We Begin? (podcast)- Need couples counseling but can’t afford it? Esther Perel is here for you. Even if you don’t, tune in and maybe you’ll learn something.
Made in Lagos by Wizkid (Spotify)- Chill out to this album and then start an Afrobeats playlist and thank me later.